It seems like we’re always waiting for the “right timing” when we should just be living. From loan payments to your sister’s baby shower, you’ll always have personal and financial entanglements. This is simply the reality of adulthood. We have obligations but we also get to choose how we prioritize them. And sometimes it’s okay to carve out time for the things we’ve always wanted to do. Skipping a wedding or graduation doesn’t have to mean you’re selfish. Personal growth is a big part of our relationships as well as our own development. So if you want to do something for yourself, make it happen.
Since childhood, I had dreamed of taking a gap-year abroad and I finally had an opportunity. But the downside of my upcoming adventure was that my partner had obligations back home. We wouldn’t be able to experience it together but he encouraged me to go anyway. Stepping out on your own sometimes is an important part of self-exploration and I knew taking a gap-year was something I had to do. However, pursuing your goals shouldn’t have to come at the expense of your relationships, romantic or platonic.
The accessibility of virtual communication has transformed the implications of travel. When my father was in college in the early 80s, he spent a year living in Austria and Germany. Though less than 50 years ago, it was a different era for communication. He settled into local life, learned German and only called his mother on the shared landline to wish her a merry Christmas. For the average person, postal mail was the only affordable option for international correspondence.
But now it’s easy to reach anyone from almost anywhere in the world. And this is a mixed blessing. It can be difficult to truly embrace a new lifestyle when your friends are constantly posting about your old life at home. Ceaseless connectivity can be a distraction from enjoying what’s in front of your face—nodding and smiling at passers-by, practicing the local language and simply taking time to contemplate the present.
However, not being cut off from the outside world is an important part of traveling abroad when you’ve had to leave your significant other behind. It allows you to continue cultivating a relationship with the person you love and pursue a cross-cultural experience for yourself at the same time. You can have professional and personal growth without forfeiting the meaningful relationships you’ve developed in your life. If you’re debating whether or not to travel abroad on your own, keep reading for some suggestions on how you can stay in touch.
Your Phone Might as Well Be a Teleportation Device
For many, instant communication is literally at their fingertips. Smartphones have made the world a smaller place and as a traveler you’ll feel this more intimately. If your trip is short-term, research international data plans from your current carrier before you go. T-Mobile may not be at the top of your list in the United States, but their international plans are very accommodating. If your stay is a bit more extended, you can also purchase a SIM card in your new city and load it with data periodically for lower fees.
Smartphones also have a variety of apps available that make international communication more accessible. WhatsApp is a popular app for texting across the globe which also has Wi-Fi calling options. Whatever social media platforms you use will also be available to you abroad for the most part. And if you’re an Apple user FaceTime can make phone calls feel like a real conversation. Skype and Zoom are alternatives for video calls as well. With an ever-widening range of options, the question is no longer whether or not you can stay in contact but how you will choose to do so.
Find Free Wi-Fi
But if you’re concerned about the phone bill you might rack up from using copious amounts of data overseas, become a Wi-Fi pirate. You’d be surprised by how many businesses offer free Wi-Fi even in mid-sized cities overseas. Try coffee shops and cafés and sometimes main plazas will even have outdoor connectivity for a limited period of time. Remember that Maximo Nivel’s campuses and all family homestays are also equipped with wireless internet service.
Public networks are an excellent way to stay in touch with your partner. But remember that they are usually not secure. So feel free to have a daily check-in with the people you’re missing but avoid accessing things like personal banking information if you’re sitting in a café.
Don’t Forget Emails
And if you’d like to compose a longer message to show your other half how much you care, don’t forget about emails. When your phone is always in your pocket, it is natural to favor texting over composing a two-page email. But if you want to send lengthy updates, emails can be a nice way to keep track of each other’s day-to-day lives. It’s not as slow as physical mail services and it can feel more like a heartfelt letter than a text does. Typing on a laptop may be easier but if you’re only traveling with a phone, you can always download your email carrier’s app.
Email will become especially important to your relationship if you are living in radically different time zones. Or if your connection leaves you sounding like you’re yodeling under water. Rather than having a broken phone call when it’s 5 in the morning for one of you, take the time to compose a thoughtful letter about your adventures. You can attach photos and videos and make sure to not leave anything out. This allows you to sit down at your favorite coffee shop and write a letter midday so that your significant other can wake up to it when it’s their morning.
But no matter what mode of communication suits you both best, what’s important is the diversity of platforms available to you. Travel is no longer the dangerous and isolating experience it once was. You aren’t walking across the Western Frontier. You aren’t taking a three-month sea voyage through uncharted territory. You’re probably taking a one or two-day flight to a well-known country overseas where you will be able to call, text or email people whenever you please. So set times to talk with whomever you’re leaving behind and don’t forget to tell them that they’re loved. But also set your phone down from time to time to remember what you’re doing for yourself.